Talking to Your Parents About Moving Into a Nursing Home

August 24, 2016
nursing home, assisted living, talking to your parents, senior care, elder care

The signs are all there: in the foreseeable future your parents won’t be able to live safely by themselves anymore. Your mom had to get a hip replacement, now she’s having trouble walking up and down stairs. Your dad has been very forgetful lately, sometimes he doesn’t take his medication or he may not even recognize his own grandchild anymore. You don’t have the space or resources to take care of your parents by yourself, so you have to consider a nursing home or assisted living facility where they can get the assistance they need.

Making it more difficult, your parents may need the need for help as clearly as you do.  Most are adamant that they don’t want to be a burden to their children, and just as often they stubbornly refuse to accept the reality that they need help in order to carry out daily living activities.  And they certainly won’t see leaving the house they made their home (and your home) for decades as any kind of solution.

You are not the first people to face this situation.  It is extremely common.  And there are way for you to talk effectively with your parents about making this move. Here are some things to keep in mind when having this conversation.

1)   The move won’t happen overnight – It’s highly unlikely that one conversation will be all it takes for your mom and/or dad to pack up their things and move. It will take time and several conversations for you and your family to discuss this life-impacting decision. Several factors, especially location and costs, need to be addressed and everyone needs to be on the same page, looking out for the best interests of the elderly parent.

2)   Involve others in the conversation – Siblings, aunts, uncles, and other close family members aren’t the only ones that should have a say. A professional and unbiased opinion should certainly be included in these discussions. Talk with a doctor or a geriatric case manager to get their perspective on your parent’s health and available care options respectively.

3)   Visit a facility – Words alone will not be able to sway your parent into embracing the move to a nursing home or assisted living facility. You’ll have to do your due diligence and plan a family visit to the facility you’re considering.  You want what’s best for your parents, so you certainly need to make sure that the facility is clean, well maintained, has fantastic employees, and takes outstanding care of their residents.

Centers Health Care has several state of the art nursing homes and assisted living facilities in New York, New Jersey, and Rhode Island. If you are exploring options for your elderly parent, contact us for more information on our facilities and the different amenities they have. Your family is our family.  And if you’d like more information, we have a comprehensive guide on how to shop for a nursing home as well as a helpful checklist of what to look for and questions to ask when you visit, It’s available for download on our website, and it’s free.

nursing home, assisted living, talking to your parents, senior care, elder care

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